I may have finally met my match ...

Okay, I'm totally just venting out my frustrations right now so feel free to bypass this post at any time.

I'm having a love/hate relationship with third semester so far.

I LOVE that I am learning so many important new things. I love that I feel like an actual nurse now. I love that I know how labs and medications tie into the patients diagnoses and why. I love that I feel comfortable in the hospital setting and that I am never nervous before the start of a clinical day. I love every one of my classes and all of the people and teachers in my program. I love that I will be a nurse someday (hopefully) and be able to make a difference in people's lives.

I HATE that I failed my math test today. I hate that I am supposed to study all night long for various classes and now all I feel like doing is crying. I love being a perfectionist most of the time, but I hate it at times like these. I hate that every fail (no matter how much it is by or how minor the significance) just tears me apart. I hate when people tell me, "Don't beat yourself up about it," even though I know they're right. I hate that I'm putting in so much time studying only to be terrified to fail something else. I hate that I chose this time in my busy life to be responsible about my eating and my PKU diet and that I have to count both calories and Phe in everything I eat every single day, yet then get an email from my dietician saying I'm eating too few calories and my Phe levels are still not where they should be because of it.

Okay, I feel a tiny bit better now. I'm seriously just so overwhelmed right now.